A (Joke) Threesome

A (Joke) Threesome

1. Man Talk

Three Catholic men were talking.
The first said, "My son is a priest; when he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'."
The second man piped in, "My son is a bishop; when he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Your Grace'."
The third man smiled. "My daughter is 6-feet tall with 38D breasts, a 24-inch waist, and 34-inch hips. When she walks into a room, everyone says, 'Oh, my God!' "

2. More Bumper Stickers

1. The Proctologist called ... They found your head!

2. Save your breath ... You'll need it to blow up your date.

3. WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.


3. Little Johnny Joke No. 1,497
One day, little Johnny got home from pre-school early and headed upstairs. As he walked by his parents' bedroom, he was surprised to see his parents naked on their bed, making love. Not wanting to traumatize the child, they continued what they were doing. Soon Johnny asked, "Daddy, can I climb on your back for a horsey ride?"
Dad thought a moment and replied, "I suppose so, son. After all, we are a family."
After he rode a while, his mother started writhing wildly.
"Hang on, Dad!" cried Johnny. "This is always where the mailman and I get bucked off!"




Strip Club Raises Money For Haiti
TOLEDO, Ohio, USA -- A strip club in Toledo, Ohio, has raised money to help the people of Haiti, Voyeurwebbers,
The club, Marilyn's on Monroe, raised almost $1,000 for victims of the earthquake that devastated Haiti by hosting a charity fund-raising event called "Lap Dances for Haiti". The club donated all of its $10 cover charges for one day to the International Services of Hope charity.
According to local news media, the name of the event was misleading because strip clubs are legal in Ohio but lap-dances are not.
Club manager Kenny Soprano said he had been considering a charity event to improve the club's reputation even before the Haiti earthquake. "We'd been racking our brains for about a month or so, thinking about what we could do," he said. "You don't hear much about strip clubs giving back to the community.
"It was pretty hard to find an organization that wants to deal with an adult entertainment establishment," said Soprano.
Linda Greene, CEO of International Services of Hope, said she was happy to accept the donation: "I don't have a problem with it," she said.




Weirdness by K.
The weirdest thing recently happened in the U.S. state of New Jersey, Voyeurwebbers; it even had allusions, or possibly illusions, to the movie "The Godfather", which would seem to be a fit in New Jersey ... and yet it doesn't fit at all.
Here's what happened: Robert Godman, 61, of Wenonah, New Jersey, apparently had a package delivered to a state senator named Stephen Sweeney. Sen. Sweeny was acting governor while Gov. Jon Corzine was on vacation. When staffers opened the package the were alarmed to find -- Eye hope's you're sitting down for this, Voyeurwebbers -- (Cue the organist!).... a plush toy horse's head!
Despite their shock, the staffers had the presence of mind to call in a bomb squad as a precaution.
According to one news report the incident appeared a likely allusion to the classic cinematic scene in "The Godfather," in which a horse's head was used as a death threat by the Mafia.
In the end, the plush toy horse's head was found to be ... a ... er ... umm ... plush toy horse's head.
Nonetheless, Mr. Godman was arrested at the home he shares with his parents and charged with harassment. New Jersey State Police said they were looking into whether Godman and the package are related to a recent series of letters and faxes.
"We take every interaction with our government officials seriously, at least of this nature," said a state police sergeant. "This was not just some benign communication."
Eye warned you this would be weird, Voyeurwebbers. And it leaves some interesting questions, for instance: If delivering a real, severed horse's head is considered a Mafia death threat, what does a plush toy horse's head mean in "Mafia-ese"? Is the mob going to put out a "cuddle" on you instead of a hit? And what did the state police sergeant mean when he said, "... at least of this nature"? It makes Eye wonder if New Jersey is being hit by a deluge of packages delivered with plush-toy animal parts. Actually, that does sound a little creepy.
As Eye sees it, Voyeurwebbers, it could be possible, though not probable, that Mr. Godman sent the wrong part of the plush toy horse to the good senator. He might have meant to send the plush toy horse's plush patootie instead. That way the message would be clear ... and no official in his or her right mind -- with the possible exception of New Jersey -- would want to launch a costly investigation into a plush toy horse's plush patootie, so that problem would be moot and tax dollars saved. K.