SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 13, 2010
Today's Cryptogram
Cryptogram for February 13
Below is today's love quote cryptogram (single letter substitution):
P OSPKAN VZ P TGYPI NGK IGAVQS; P QMPHYSH VZ GIS TMG IGAVQSZ NGK..... PECPV ZASDSIZGI
Answer to yesterday's cryptogram: For one human being to love another: that is perhaps the most difficult of our tasks.....Rainer Maria Rilke
(Hint: It's an inspirational quote or bit o' wisdom, with the name of the person who is credited as having said it.)
Cryptogram
"NDO PSSLSDUX SNKPOU YLWX
UXSXORLZXI YLWX'I PSSLSDUX
SNKPOUI DI." --XPOY
ZLHESLZHPYX
My Decoded Version
"--- -------- ------ ----
---------- ----'- --------
------- --." ------
-----------
The Encrypted Letter
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
represents
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z -
A B C D E F G H I J K L M
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
0 0 0 4 1 0 0 2 4 0 2 7 0
N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
3 5 6 0 1 10 0 5 0 2 9 4 3
Reset
Yesterday's Cryptogram Answer, and Today's Quote of the Day, is:
"Always direct your thoughts to those truths that will give you confidence, hope, joy, love, thanksgiving, and turn away your mind from those that inspire you with fear, sadness, depression." --Bertrand Wilbertforce
CNWSW LSW VMEW CNBPDV ZNBAN ALPPMC OW YWLSPWF GIBAUYT, LPF CBEW, ZNBAN BV LYY ZW NLQW, EIVC OW RLBF NWLQBYT KMS CNWBS LAGIBSBPD. CNWT LSW CNW QWST VBERYWVC CNBPDV LPF OWALIVW BC CLUWV L ELP'V YBKW CM UPMZ CNWE CNW YBCCYW PWZ CNLC WLAN ELP DWCV KSME YBKW BV QWST AMVCYT LPF CNW MPYT NWSBCLDW NW NLV CM YWLQW
WSPWVC NWEBPDZLT
VE VZ IRXRH QPBA EQ EWHQN BNBA XRERHBI DIJRHNRBH. B HRBF CDA TWRTPZ EWR CBHYBCR HRCDFBHFA VI TBZR ZQORYQJA - BIJ NR BHR IQE IBOVIC IBORZ YDE EWVZ NQDFJ YR WVZ NVGR - VZ UDVREFA EHAVIC EQ JVZTBHJ WVZ DIJRHNRBH, NWVTW ZWR VZ GHBIPFA LRBFQDZ QG, YRTBDZR EWR CDA ZRROZ EQ WBXR B OQHR VIEVOBER HRFBEVQIZWVK NVEW VE EWBI NVEW WRH
JBXR YBHHA
SXIFL XZH BLQ VLESQ VEJSH SXIFLY VRBL TEI, YZEJQ XZH TEI YSQQM XSEZQ. IZGZEVZ (JROLXJH XGX HEVZ IZHQJ)
Y8P8YWYYMYY82MFSJMKM21GM2Z4MVAJMMMPDFM1S5ZBVR65QQF535ZG6TZQZUZVZ3ZC8TEG6G8Y518YN4MPS8SDM297M2MPMR4US221M2M2ZGV9ZTZ3ZKZ5ZJVQKTVW45M4Z5R3AQ91WG8Z6X8Y3UMH3PM2MRD2MMMFS3M5M2SAM2HJVR3P62Z5MVZVTHV466V5ZJB5Y5M
LAUGH AND THE WHOLE WORLD LAUGHS WITH YOU, SNORE AND YOU SLEEP ALONE. UNKNOWN (RICHARD AKA DOWN UNDER)
2/13 FNOGC MNO KIM WUFPUNBIG FAIDIFPSDK KOFA IK HUGHN IBC WDNCN HIYYUBK IDS FDSIPODSK NW ANHHUP?
Y8B8Y7YYNYY82MFSJM7M2FGM2Z4MVAJMHMHDFM1S5ZBVRV5WQF535ZG6TZQZUZVZ3ZC8T4G7G8Y418YN4MPS8S2M197M2MPMR4US221M2M2ZGV9ZUZ5ZKZ5ZJVQKTVW45M4Z5R3AQ9ZWH8Z6X8Y3UMH3PA2MRD2MMMFS3M5M2SAM2HJVR3U6RZ5MVZVTHV466V5ZJB5Y5M
2/13 COULD YOU SAY FICTIONAL CHARACTERS SUCH AS BILBO AND FRODO BAGGINS ARE CREATURES OF HOBBIT?
"One, two, Freddy's coming for you.
Three, four, better lock your door.
Five, six, grab your crucifix.
Seven, eight, gonna stay up late.
Nine, ten, never sleep again.
One, two Freddy's coming for you
three, four better lock your door
five, six grab your crucifix
seven, eight gonna stay up late
nine, ten he's back again."
Today's Crypto Number (4220) (Saturday)
O UCX BOX CX CJLAVPXY ZX CXE YZSOU, CLCOXWY CXE ZSSZXPXY. SPZSGP RXZB YFOW, CXK WYPPJ UGPCJ ZI VP CY SCJYOPW. ZIYPX, CW C WOLX ZI YFPOJ LJPCY JPWSPUY, YFPE KZX'Y PMPX OXMOYP VP.--KCMP TCJJE
Hint: O=I
Yesterday's Answer Number(3910) (Friday) FMMCD ZGN FXQ OZDQN BZBNG XEHNDD ON DBNEP VE ZIQVME QYN OVDPML ON ANQ RGML QYMXAYQ - ZDHNNB. OYNE ON ZGN ONZGW MR QYN HVJVEA, ON LZW GNBZVG QM QYN PNZP, OYM YZJN EMQYVEA MR BNNJVDYENDD, BGVPN, MG PNDVAE VE QYNVG IMEJNGDZQVME.--OVHHVZL FXQHNG WNZQD Books are but waste paper unless we spend in action the wisdom we get from thought - asleep. When we are weary of the living, we may repair to the dead, who have nothing of peevishness, pride, or design in their conversation.--William Butler Yeats
Wordles Thought for the Day:
God must love the rich or he wouldn't divide so much among so few of them.
-H L Mencken
A KZKWIAYKG ITCXWTN QFANK A YFTEEKG, VJX AX QMY XWJNU M CKMW-GKVX KZEKWAKCIK.
Hint: J = U
Sunday, February 14, 2010
SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 14, 2010
SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 14, 2010
Today's Cryptogram
Cryptogram for February 14
Below is today's love quote cryptogram (single letter substitution):
VCH OVTF LTHHA MA VL KSS XQH OHWZQX KCF DKWC VL SWLH: XQKX OVTF WA SVNH..... AVDQVGSHA
Answer to yesterday's cryptogram: A beauty is a woman you notice; A charmer is one who notices you..... Adlai Stevenson
(Hint: It's an inspirational quote or bit o' wisdom, with the name of the person who is credited as having said it.)
Cryptogram
"QPJQUB BCWNXMQ TH TE
YEQOYBTXMQ JTCB WL MYLQ TER
GVQE YB UWZQH, VWMR KWNC
VQTR VYFV, MWWA YB HDNTCQMK
YE BVQ QKQ TER HTK, 'Y GYMM
XQ XYFFQC BVTE KWN. KWN
UTEEWB RQLQTB ZQ.' " --TEE
MTERQCH
My Decoded Version
"------ ------- -- --
---------- ---- -- ---- ---
---- -- -----, ---- ----
---- ----, ---- -- --------
-- --- --- --- ---, '- ----
-- ------ ---- ---. ---
------ ------ --.' " -----
-------
The Encrypted Letter
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
represents
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z -
A B C D E F G H I J K L M
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
1 10 6 1 12 3 2 5 0 2 6 3 9
N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
5 1 1 19 6 0 14 3 7 10 4 10 2
Reset
Yesterday's Cryptogram Answer, and Today's Quote of the Day, is:
"Dwell as near as possible to the channel in which your life flows." --Henry David Thoreau
GWAGQW IQWWG GWHRWHPQD FV ESWFT PWLI HE VFJSE AVQD PWRHYIW TAYJS UWV IEHVL TWHLD EA LA ZFAQWVRW AV ESWFT PWSHQX.
JWATJW ATCWQQ
ATNSRTB Z FNLT IZA AQB Z GBZMT IZA HNTL KQFA QA SRT SBZOYL QD RNLSQBW SQ FZNS DQB SRT SBZNA QD SRT DESEBT SQ BEA QMTB RNI
KFNPRS TNLTARQFTB
A EQI'X UMBJ TQBJH. A TSHX KMXVR XRJ LQZJCIUJIX MIE CJDQCX XRJ YMVXH. KAGG CQLJCH
Y8M8Y9YYPYY82MFSJMKM2KGM2Z4MVAJMKMMDFM1S5ZBVRV5NQF535ZG6TZQZBZVZ3ZC8THG6G8Y418YN4MPS8SVM397M2MPMR3US221M2M2ZGV9Z2Z4ZKZ5ZJVQKTVG45M4Z5R3AQ91WG8Z6X8Y3UMH3PM2MRD2MMMES3M5M2SAM2HJVR3Q6QZ5MVZVTHV466V5ZJB5Y5M
I DON'T MAKE JOKES. I JUST WATCH THE GOVERNMENT AND REPORT THE FACTS. WILL ROGERS
2/14 GUDXBT IWFO WXID UAXBQ U GIZXKE OXDDFQQIH AE UK XZH TUFZXM: "OMFDI XG QLI UKOFIKQ DUMFKIM."
Y898Y8YYYYY82MFSJMKM26GM2Z4MVAJMUMRDFM1S5ZBVRV58QF535ZG6TZQZCZVZ3ZC8T2GVG8Y418YN4MPS8SCM297M2MPMR3UM221M2M2ZGV9Z4Z2ZKZ5ZJVQKTVH35M4Z5R3AQ9ZWQ8Z6X8Y3UMH3PS2MRD2MMMES3M5M2SAM2HJVR316BZ5MVZVTHV46665ZJB5Y5M
2/14 FAMOUS EPIC POEM ABOUT A FELONY COMMITTED BY AN OLD SAILOR: 'CRIME OF THE ANCIENT MARINER.'
Today's Crypto Number (2220) (Sunday)
BRKJAJWM JM LIYQ SB KIUFQKV RD JUUQKQOICWJQM.--YIKARC WILB
Hint: B=P
Yesterday's Answer Number(4220) (Saturday) O UCX BOX CX CJLAVPXY ZX CXE YZSOU, CLCOXWY CXE ZSSZXPXY. SPZSGP RXZB YFOW, CXK WYPPJ UGPCJ ZI VP CY SCJYOPW. ZIYPX, CW C WOLX ZI YFPOJ LJPCY JPWSPUY, YFPE KZX'Y PMPX OXMOYP VP.--KCMP TCJJE I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at parties. Often, as a sign of their great respect, they don't even invite me.--Dave Barry
Wordles Thought for the Day:
Children require guidance and sympathy far more than instruction.
-Anne Sullivan
QINA JIN VSB ITR JXSFVCN MNJJKAM SZZ IKL ISXLN TJ XKRKAM LYISSC, JIN SJINX YIKCRXNA RNXKRNR IKG.
Hint: J = T
Here are the answers to the last week of CryptoQuips sent in the Thought for the Day Daily email:
2/13/2010 :
I exercised control while I shopped, but it was truly a near-debt experience.
2/12/2010 :
If English class should follow algebra, could one possibly call it the aftermath?
2/11/2010 :
When a person plans to supervise a trip to Europe, will he oversea it?
2/10/2010 :
Not about to waste more margarine, I swore I would hang on until the butter end.
2/9/2010 :
The monarch makes up so many untrue tales, people are calling him the lyin' king.
2/8/2010 :
I know of a demolition company that happily refers to itself as "Edifice wrecks."
2/7/2010 :
If the old prospector is fortunate, I guess he could find himself a plot of gold.
Today's Cryptogram
Cryptogram for February 14
Below is today's love quote cryptogram (single letter substitution):
VCH OVTF LTHHA MA VL KSS XQH OHWZQX KCF DKWC VL SWLH: XQKX OVTF WA SVNH..... AVDQVGSHA
Answer to yesterday's cryptogram: A beauty is a woman you notice; A charmer is one who notices you..... Adlai Stevenson
(Hint: It's an inspirational quote or bit o' wisdom, with the name of the person who is credited as having said it.)
Cryptogram
"QPJQUB BCWNXMQ TH TE
YEQOYBTXMQ JTCB WL MYLQ TER
GVQE YB UWZQH, VWMR KWNC
VQTR VYFV, MWWA YB HDNTCQMK
YE BVQ QKQ TER HTK, 'Y GYMM
XQ XYFFQC BVTE KWN. KWN
UTEEWB RQLQTB ZQ.' " --TEE
MTERQCH
My Decoded Version
"------ ------- -- --
---------- ---- -- ---- ---
---- -- -----, ---- ----
---- ----, ---- -- --------
-- --- --- --- ---, '- ----
-- ------ ---- ---. ---
------ ------ --.' " -----
-------
The Encrypted Letter
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
represents
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z -
A B C D E F G H I J K L M
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
1 10 6 1 12 3 2 5 0 2 6 3 9
N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
5 1 1 19 6 0 14 3 7 10 4 10 2
Reset
Yesterday's Cryptogram Answer, and Today's Quote of the Day, is:
"Dwell as near as possible to the channel in which your life flows." --Henry David Thoreau
GWAGQW IQWWG GWHRWHPQD FV ESWFT PWLI HE VFJSE AVQD PWRHYIW TAYJS UWV IEHVL TWHLD EA LA ZFAQWVRW AV ESWFT PWSHQX.
JWATJW ATCWQQ
ATNSRTB Z FNLT IZA AQB Z GBZMT IZA HNTL KQFA QA SRT SBZOYL QD RNLSQBW SQ FZNS DQB SRT SBZNA QD SRT DESEBT SQ BEA QMTB RNI
KFNPRS TNLTARQFTB
A EQI'X UMBJ TQBJH. A TSHX KMXVR XRJ LQZJCIUJIX MIE CJDQCX XRJ YMVXH. KAGG CQLJCH
Y8M8Y9YYPYY82MFSJMKM2KGM2Z4MVAJMKMMDFM1S5ZBVRV5NQF535ZG6TZQZBZVZ3ZC8THG6G8Y418YN4MPS8SVM397M2MPMR3US221M2M2ZGV9Z2Z4ZKZ5ZJVQKTVG45M4Z5R3AQ91WG8Z6X8Y3UMH3PM2MRD2MMMES3M5M2SAM2HJVR3Q6QZ5MVZVTHV466V5ZJB5Y5M
I DON'T MAKE JOKES. I JUST WATCH THE GOVERNMENT AND REPORT THE FACTS. WILL ROGERS
2/14 GUDXBT IWFO WXID UAXBQ U GIZXKE OXDDFQQIH AE UK XZH TUFZXM: "OMFDI XG QLI UKOFIKQ DUMFKIM."
Y898Y8YYYYY82MFSJMKM26GM2Z4MVAJMUMRDFM1S5ZBVRV58QF535ZG6TZQZCZVZ3ZC8T2GVG8Y418YN4MPS8SCM297M2MPMR3UM221M2M2ZGV9Z4Z2ZKZ5ZJVQKTVH35M4Z5R3AQ9ZWQ8Z6X8Y3UMH3PS2MRD2MMMES3M5M2SAM2HJVR316BZ5MVZVTHV46665ZJB5Y5M
2/14 FAMOUS EPIC POEM ABOUT A FELONY COMMITTED BY AN OLD SAILOR: 'CRIME OF THE ANCIENT MARINER.'
Today's Crypto Number (2220) (Sunday)
BRKJAJWM JM LIYQ SB KIUFQKV RD JUUQKQOICWJQM.--YIKARC WILB
Hint: B=P
Yesterday's Answer Number(4220) (Saturday) O UCX BOX CX CJLAVPXY ZX CXE YZSOU, CLCOXWY CXE ZSSZXPXY. SPZSGP RXZB YFOW, CXK WYPPJ UGPCJ ZI VP CY SCJYOPW. ZIYPX, CW C WOLX ZI YFPOJ LJPCY JPWSPUY, YFPE KZX'Y PMPX OXMOYP VP.--KCMP TCJJE I can win an argument on any topic, against any opponent. People know this, and steer clear of me at parties. Often, as a sign of their great respect, they don't even invite me.--Dave Barry
Wordles Thought for the Day:
Children require guidance and sympathy far more than instruction.
-Anne Sullivan
QINA JIN VSB ITR JXSFVCN MNJJKAM SZZ IKL ISXLN TJ XKRKAM LYISSC, JIN SJINX YIKCRXNA RNXKRNR IKG.
Hint: J = T
Here are the answers to the last week of CryptoQuips sent in the Thought for the Day Daily email:
2/13/2010 :
I exercised control while I shopped, but it was truly a near-debt experience.
2/12/2010 :
If English class should follow algebra, could one possibly call it the aftermath?
2/11/2010 :
When a person plans to supervise a trip to Europe, will he oversea it?
2/10/2010 :
Not about to waste more margarine, I swore I would hang on until the butter end.
2/9/2010 :
The monarch makes up so many untrue tales, people are calling him the lyin' king.
2/8/2010 :
I know of a demolition company that happily refers to itself as "Edifice wrecks."
2/7/2010 :
If the old prospector is fortunate, I guess he could find himself a plot of gold.
Humor Threesome
Humor Threesome
1. Bon Apetit
"Excuse me, waiter, but your finger is in my soup!"
"Yes," replied the server, "I have a fungus under my nail and my doctor told me to keep it warm and moist."
The irate customer snapped, "Then why don't you just stick it up your ass?"
The waiter immediately replied, "Oh, that's what I do when I'm in the kitchen!"
2. Rock'n Roll Heaven
Jerry Garcia awoke in an all-white recording studio, surrounded by instruments.
Jimi Hendrix and Duane Allman were tuning their guitars. John Lennon was seated at the piano.
Janis Joplin and Buddy Holly were warming up.
As he plugged into his amp, an awestruck Garcia murmured, "Wow! There really is a rock 'n' roll heaven!"
Elvis Presley said to him, "Heaven?" just as Karen Carpenter sat down at the drums and said, "Okay, people. 'Close To You' in E-flat. One, two, one, two..."
3. Good News/Bad News
Doctor: "I have good news and bad news, Liz."
Liz: "What's the good news, Doc?"
Doc: "Your lab tests came back today and your crabs are gone."
Liz: "Gee, that's great! But what's the bad news?"
Doctor: "We don't know what killed them!"
Cambridge Co-eds Asked To Quell Passion ... Why?
CAMBRIDGE, England -- If you've got a post-graduate degree, Voyeurwebbers, you might want to consider "tuning up" your education by obtaining a fellowship grant to study at England's Cambridge University. I only mention this because things in the ivy-covered halls have changed considerably in the past decade or so and university life has become much more fun ... er ... I mean, much more geared to the serious student.Here's why:
All 400 undergraduate students at historic Cambridge University's all-women Newham College have been asked to tone down their love life. The young women were sent a polite e-mail asking the to be more "discreet" when in the throes of passion after Newham College's student union received 30 complaints about the noise.
Newnham College undergraduate president Lizzy Cole sent the message asking them to quell their passion so others could get a good night's sleep.
Miss Cole, 19, who was on last year's Cambridge University Challenge team, said that while Newnham had a reputation for being "slutty" the e-mail did not just refer to sex.
Boyfriends are allowed to stay in student rooms at the 139-year-old college for two days before they have to register for a spare room.
One Newnham undergraduate, 20, said: "It's just so embarrassing to think that people have been listening in. I was blushing when I got the email.
"You try to keep it down, but it's easy to forget the walls are so thin if you get a bit carried away. This sort of thing must happen at every university in the country. Only in Cambridge would your fellow students complain. They'll be handing out ear plugs next."
Rear of the Year by K.
There is an annual event in Britain, Voyeurwebbers, that not only reflects Britons' eccentric sense of humor, but the national pride they take in their expertise at identifying a really great rear end on a woman. The event is called the "Rear of the Year", with various categories, so naturally Eye likes to keep a close watch on the event.
The nominations for this year's Rear of the Year awards have barely begun -- the winners will be announced in June at a gala ceremony at London's Dorchester Hotel -- and a buzz is brewing about an unexpected nominee who is rising up the list in on-line nomination polls. Eye should mention that the Rear of the Year top award goes to the British woman deemed to have the best-looking rear in a tight pair of jeans, which may explain why Wizard Jeans is hosting this year's event.
The reason for the buzz is Harriet Harman who, at first glance, seems an odd nominee. For one thing, Ms. Harmon is an MP (Member of Parliament) representing the Camberwell and Peckham district, and is also a leader of the House of Commons, and Minister for Women in the British cabinet.
She is known for her staunch feminist views, wants pictures of the scantily clad young women known as Page 3 girls banned from the workplace, wants the term "chairman" banned as being sexist -- and has been nominated for the annual Rear of the Year award. No one seems to know for sure if the nominations were from admirers of Ms. Harman's derrier, or merely tongue-in-cheek ... pun intended.
Nonetheless, earlier this week Ms. Harman had already received 12 nominations, according to Rear of the Year organizer Tony Edwards.
"These are not large numbers but a dozen nominations in one week usually indicates encouragement on a fan-based website or an organized group effort of some kind," Edwards told local news media.
"During the past month we've received flurries of votes inspired by celebrities on Strictly Come Dancing, Celebrity Dancing on Ice and various TV soaps, but we're surprised to see the MP for Camberwell and Peckham among the latest nominations," said Edwards, then rattled off a couple of double entendres that Eye liked.
One: "Perhaps some of Labour's (Britain's Labour Party) backbenchers have decided to get behind her in the competition."
Two: "These are early days with a further four months of voting to go so it would be premature to talk about a winner from the world of politics or whether Ms Harman's seat is set for the spotlight."
So there you have it, Voyeurwebbers. The Rear of the Year contest just got underway and already the drama, tension, and anticipation of seeing some British women with great rear ends are building. Will Harriet Hartman have the best bum in Britain, or will that hot, sexy young newcomer Lady Gaga wiggle away with the top prize for the best bottom?
Rest assured, Voyeurwebbers, Eye will keep a close watch on British women's rear ends -- and those of whole lot of women in other countries -- between now and June. It's easy. You can do it, too. All you have to do is browse through any or all of VW's sections. It's a good thing the Rear of the Year contest isn't until June, Eye can almost get a tenth of the way through VW's archive, Funbags, by then. K.
1. Bon Apetit
"Excuse me, waiter, but your finger is in my soup!"
"Yes," replied the server, "I have a fungus under my nail and my doctor told me to keep it warm and moist."
The irate customer snapped, "Then why don't you just stick it up your ass?"
The waiter immediately replied, "Oh, that's what I do when I'm in the kitchen!"
2. Rock'n Roll Heaven
Jerry Garcia awoke in an all-white recording studio, surrounded by instruments.
Jimi Hendrix and Duane Allman were tuning their guitars. John Lennon was seated at the piano.
Janis Joplin and Buddy Holly were warming up.
As he plugged into his amp, an awestruck Garcia murmured, "Wow! There really is a rock 'n' roll heaven!"
Elvis Presley said to him, "Heaven?" just as Karen Carpenter sat down at the drums and said, "Okay, people. 'Close To You' in E-flat. One, two, one, two..."
3. Good News/Bad News
Doctor: "I have good news and bad news, Liz."
Liz: "What's the good news, Doc?"
Doc: "Your lab tests came back today and your crabs are gone."
Liz: "Gee, that's great! But what's the bad news?"
Doctor: "We don't know what killed them!"
Cambridge Co-eds Asked To Quell Passion ... Why?
CAMBRIDGE, England -- If you've got a post-graduate degree, Voyeurwebbers, you might want to consider "tuning up" your education by obtaining a fellowship grant to study at England's Cambridge University. I only mention this because things in the ivy-covered halls have changed considerably in the past decade or so and university life has become much more fun ... er ... I mean, much more geared to the serious student.Here's why:
All 400 undergraduate students at historic Cambridge University's all-women Newham College have been asked to tone down their love life. The young women were sent a polite e-mail asking the to be more "discreet" when in the throes of passion after Newham College's student union received 30 complaints about the noise.
Newnham College undergraduate president Lizzy Cole sent the message asking them to quell their passion so others could get a good night's sleep.
Miss Cole, 19, who was on last year's Cambridge University Challenge team, said that while Newnham had a reputation for being "slutty" the e-mail did not just refer to sex.
Boyfriends are allowed to stay in student rooms at the 139-year-old college for two days before they have to register for a spare room.
One Newnham undergraduate, 20, said: "It's just so embarrassing to think that people have been listening in. I was blushing when I got the email.
"You try to keep it down, but it's easy to forget the walls are so thin if you get a bit carried away. This sort of thing must happen at every university in the country. Only in Cambridge would your fellow students complain. They'll be handing out ear plugs next."
Rear of the Year by K.
There is an annual event in Britain, Voyeurwebbers, that not only reflects Britons' eccentric sense of humor, but the national pride they take in their expertise at identifying a really great rear end on a woman. The event is called the "Rear of the Year", with various categories, so naturally Eye likes to keep a close watch on the event.
The nominations for this year's Rear of the Year awards have barely begun -- the winners will be announced in June at a gala ceremony at London's Dorchester Hotel -- and a buzz is brewing about an unexpected nominee who is rising up the list in on-line nomination polls. Eye should mention that the Rear of the Year top award goes to the British woman deemed to have the best-looking rear in a tight pair of jeans, which may explain why Wizard Jeans is hosting this year's event.
The reason for the buzz is Harriet Harman who, at first glance, seems an odd nominee. For one thing, Ms. Harmon is an MP (Member of Parliament) representing the Camberwell and Peckham district, and is also a leader of the House of Commons, and Minister for Women in the British cabinet.
She is known for her staunch feminist views, wants pictures of the scantily clad young women known as Page 3 girls banned from the workplace, wants the term "chairman" banned as being sexist -- and has been nominated for the annual Rear of the Year award. No one seems to know for sure if the nominations were from admirers of Ms. Harman's derrier, or merely tongue-in-cheek ... pun intended.
Nonetheless, earlier this week Ms. Harman had already received 12 nominations, according to Rear of the Year organizer Tony Edwards.
"These are not large numbers but a dozen nominations in one week usually indicates encouragement on a fan-based website or an organized group effort of some kind," Edwards told local news media.
"During the past month we've received flurries of votes inspired by celebrities on Strictly Come Dancing, Celebrity Dancing on Ice and various TV soaps, but we're surprised to see the MP for Camberwell and Peckham among the latest nominations," said Edwards, then rattled off a couple of double entendres that Eye liked.
One: "Perhaps some of Labour's (Britain's Labour Party) backbenchers have decided to get behind her in the competition."
Two: "These are early days with a further four months of voting to go so it would be premature to talk about a winner from the world of politics or whether Ms Harman's seat is set for the spotlight."
So there you have it, Voyeurwebbers. The Rear of the Year contest just got underway and already the drama, tension, and anticipation of seeing some British women with great rear ends are building. Will Harriet Hartman have the best bum in Britain, or will that hot, sexy young newcomer Lady Gaga wiggle away with the top prize for the best bottom?
Rest assured, Voyeurwebbers, Eye will keep a close watch on British women's rear ends -- and those of whole lot of women in other countries -- between now and June. It's easy. You can do it, too. All you have to do is browse through any or all of VW's sections. It's a good thing the Rear of the Year contest isn't until June, Eye can almost get a tenth of the way through VW's archive, Funbags, by then. K.
Friday, February 12, 2010
FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 12, 2010
FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 12, 2010
Today's Cryptogram
Cryptogram for February 12
Below is today's love quote cryptogram (single letter substitution):
VKJ KQY FRSHQ UYCQA NK PKGY HQKNFYJ: NFHN CM LYJFHLM NFY SKMN ICVVCBRPN KV KRJ NHMEM.....JHCQYJ SHJCH JCPEY
Answer to yesterday's cryptogram: He has achieved success who has lived well, laughed often, and loved much..... Bessie Stanle
(Hint: It's an inspirational quote or bit o' wisdom, with the name of the person who is credited as having said it.)
Cryptogram
"MNGQOQJO. GTU CMLGXQAU MX
DUIQUK GTFG UHUXEGTQAB QJ
DUFYGQKYI, QALIYCQAB VTFG QJ
YBIE." -FODXMJU DQUXLU
My Decoded Version
"--------. --- -------- --
------ ---- ---------- --
---------, --------- ---- --
----." -------- ------
The Encrypted Letter
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
represents
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z -
A B C D E F G H I J K L M
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
4 3 2 4 2 4 8 1 4 4 2 3 4
N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
1 3 0 11 0 0 4 10 1 0 5 4 0
Reset
Yesterday's Cryptogram Answer, and Today's Quote of the Day, is:
"Happiness is an attitude of mind, born of the simple determination to be happy under all outward circumstances." --J. Donald Walters
FLRN HN JEN ALWNCJQ JK MSKZ, JK PJJNC, GSV JK GCFPN UCNNAQ GYYKCVLSF JK YKSBYLNSYN, GWKRN GAA ALWNCJLNB.
TKES HLAJKS
OS QSOAA DTFWOLQ SDMT SVWS LU PMQSOZORWSOUL UZ HODSMT YOAA TLWXAT W FWL SU XT HODSMUMQ.
R.Q. ATYOQ
UV YPDV GR JVRJZV RY HRMO NIH MJ UVDIMTV HRM'ZZ YVVK GAVW RY HRMO NIH KRNY. N. WPQYVO
Y848Y5YYXYY82MFSJM7M2GGM2Z4SVAJMVMSDFM1S5ZBVRV5FQF535ZG6TZQZNZVZ3ZC8X8G1G8Y418YN4MPS8SAM297M2MPMRUUM221M2M2ZGV9ZUZ4ZKZ5ZJVQKTV135M4Z5R3AQ9ZWS8Z6X8Y3UMH3PS2MRD2MMMWS4M5M2SAM2HJVR3G62Z5MVZVTHV466V5ZJB5Y5M
BE NICE TO PEOPLE ON YOUR WAY UP BECAUSE YOU'LL NEED THEM ON YOUR WAY DOWN. W. MIGNER
2/12 PO EJJ RO QUG MGRMJG PC E CEQPRC ZGIPC QR ISRRT QUGTNGJKGN, PN QUEQ QUG ZSLNUPC' SGKRJLQPRC?
Y8H8YWYY3YY82MFSJMKM27GM2Z4SVAJMRMUDFM1S5ZBVR65UQF535ZG6TZQZMZVZ3ZC8X7GMG8Y418YN4MPS8S6M197M2MPMRUUS221M2M2ZGV9Z3Z2ZKZ5ZJVQKTVP45M4Z5R3AQ91W68Z6X8Y3UMH3PA2MRD2MMMWS4M5M2SAM2HJVR326UZ5MVZVTHV466V5ZJB5Y5M
2/12 IF ALL OF THE PEOPLE IN A NATION BEGIN TO GROOM THEMSELVES, IS THAT THE BRUSHIN' REVOLUTION?
Today's Crypto Number (3910) (Friday)
FMMCD ZGN FXQ OZDQN BZBNG XEHNDD ON DBNEP VE ZIQVME QYN OVDPML ON ANQ RGML QYMXAYQ - ZDHNNB. OYNE ON ZGN ONZGW MR QYN HVJVEA, ON LZW GNBZVG QM QYN PNZP, OYM YZJN EMQYVEA MR BNNJVDYENDD, BGVPN, MG PNDVAE VE QYNVG IMEJNGDZQVME.--OVHHVZL FXQHNG WNZQD
Hint: F=B
Yesterday's Answer Number(2215) (Thursday) RFH BHZBSH YFZ CVH VHNCVQHQ CW UZVCS STUJPCVJHW CVH RFZWH YFZ EZVHNZ ZVQJPCVD BSHCWTVHW RFHUWHSIHW CPQ EJPQ MZUBHPWCRJZP JP JPRHVEHVJPN YJRF RFH BSHCWTVHW ZE ZRFHVW.--LHVRVCPQ VTWWHSS The people who are regarded as moral luminaries are those who forego ordinary pleasures themselves and find compensation in interfering with the pleasures of others.--Bertrand Russell
Wordles Thought for the Day:
It's all very well in practice, but it will never work in theory.
-French Management saying
QR XZOIQML FITMM MLNEIA RNIINV TIOXKCT, FNEIA NZX YNMMQKIJ FTII QD DLX TRDXCHTDL?
Hint: D = T
Today's Cryptogram
Cryptogram for February 12
Below is today's love quote cryptogram (single letter substitution):
VKJ KQY FRSHQ UYCQA NK PKGY HQKNFYJ: NFHN CM LYJFHLM NFY SKMN ICVVCBRPN KV KRJ NHMEM.....JHCQYJ SHJCH JCPEY
Answer to yesterday's cryptogram: He has achieved success who has lived well, laughed often, and loved much..... Bessie Stanle
(Hint: It's an inspirational quote or bit o' wisdom, with the name of the person who is credited as having said it.)
Cryptogram
"MNGQOQJO. GTU CMLGXQAU MX
DUIQUK GTFG UHUXEGTQAB QJ
DUFYGQKYI, QALIYCQAB VTFG QJ
YBIE." -FODXMJU DQUXLU
My Decoded Version
"--------. --- -------- --
------ ---- ---------- --
---------, --------- ---- --
----." -------- ------
The Encrypted Letter
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
represents
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z -
A B C D E F G H I J K L M
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
4 3 2 4 2 4 8 1 4 4 2 3 4
N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
1 3 0 11 0 0 4 10 1 0 5 4 0
Reset
Yesterday's Cryptogram Answer, and Today's Quote of the Day, is:
"Happiness is an attitude of mind, born of the simple determination to be happy under all outward circumstances." --J. Donald Walters
FLRN HN JEN ALWNCJQ JK MSKZ, JK PJJNC, GSV JK GCFPN UCNNAQ GYYKCVLSF JK YKSBYLNSYN, GWKRN GAA ALWNCJLNB.
TKES HLAJKS
OS QSOAA DTFWOLQ SDMT SVWS LU PMQSOZORWSOUL UZ HODSMT YOAA TLWXAT W FWL SU XT HODSMUMQ.
R.Q. ATYOQ
UV YPDV GR JVRJZV RY HRMO NIH MJ UVDIMTV HRM'ZZ YVVK GAVW RY HRMO NIH KRNY. N. WPQYVO
Y848Y5YYXYY82MFSJM7M2GGM2Z4SVAJMVMSDFM1S5ZBVRV5FQF535ZG6TZQZNZVZ3ZC8X8G1G8Y418YN4MPS8SAM297M2MPMRUUM221M2M2ZGV9ZUZ4ZKZ5ZJVQKTV135M4Z5R3AQ9ZWS8Z6X8Y3UMH3PS2MRD2MMMWS4M5M2SAM2HJVR3G62Z5MVZVTHV466V5ZJB5Y5M
BE NICE TO PEOPLE ON YOUR WAY UP BECAUSE YOU'LL NEED THEM ON YOUR WAY DOWN. W. MIGNER
2/12 PO EJJ RO QUG MGRMJG PC E CEQPRC ZGIPC QR ISRRT QUGTNGJKGN, PN QUEQ QUG ZSLNUPC' SGKRJLQPRC?
Y8H8YWYY3YY82MFSJMKM27GM2Z4SVAJMRMUDFM1S5ZBVR65UQF535ZG6TZQZMZVZ3ZC8X7GMG8Y418YN4MPS8S6M197M2MPMRUUS221M2M2ZGV9Z3Z2ZKZ5ZJVQKTVP45M4Z5R3AQ91W68Z6X8Y3UMH3PA2MRD2MMMWS4M5M2SAM2HJVR326UZ5MVZVTHV466V5ZJB5Y5M
2/12 IF ALL OF THE PEOPLE IN A NATION BEGIN TO GROOM THEMSELVES, IS THAT THE BRUSHIN' REVOLUTION?
Today's Crypto Number (3910) (Friday)
FMMCD ZGN FXQ OZDQN BZBNG XEHNDD ON DBNEP VE ZIQVME QYN OVDPML ON ANQ RGML QYMXAYQ - ZDHNNB. OYNE ON ZGN ONZGW MR QYN HVJVEA, ON LZW GNBZVG QM QYN PNZP, OYM YZJN EMQYVEA MR BNNJVDYENDD, BGVPN, MG PNDVAE VE QYNVG IMEJNGDZQVME.--OVHHVZL FXQHNG WNZQD
Hint: F=B
Yesterday's Answer Number(2215) (Thursday) RFH BHZBSH YFZ CVH VHNCVQHQ CW UZVCS STUJPCVJHW CVH RFZWH YFZ EZVHNZ ZVQJPCVD BSHCWTVHW RFHUWHSIHW CPQ EJPQ MZUBHPWCRJZP JP JPRHVEHVJPN YJRF RFH BSHCWTVHW ZE ZRFHVW.--LHVRVCPQ VTWWHSS The people who are regarded as moral luminaries are those who forego ordinary pleasures themselves and find compensation in interfering with the pleasures of others.--Bertrand Russell
Wordles Thought for the Day:
It's all very well in practice, but it will never work in theory.
-French Management saying
QR XZOIQML FITMM MLNEIA RNIINV TIOXKCT, FNEIA NZX YNMMQKIJ FTII QD DLX TRDXCHTDL?
Hint: D = T
A (Joke) Threesome
A (Joke) Threesome
1. Man Talk
Three Catholic men were talking.
The first said, "My son is a priest; when he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'."
The second man piped in, "My son is a bishop; when he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Your Grace'."
The third man smiled. "My daughter is 6-feet tall with 38D breasts, a 24-inch waist, and 34-inch hips. When she walks into a room, everyone says, 'Oh, my God!' "
2. More Bumper Stickers
1. The Proctologist called ... They found your head!
2. Save your breath ... You'll need it to blow up your date.
3. WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.
3. Little Johnny Joke No. 1,497
One day, little Johnny got home from pre-school early and headed upstairs. As he walked by his parents' bedroom, he was surprised to see his parents naked on their bed, making love. Not wanting to traumatize the child, they continued what they were doing. Soon Johnny asked, "Daddy, can I climb on your back for a horsey ride?"
Dad thought a moment and replied, "I suppose so, son. After all, we are a family."
After he rode a while, his mother started writhing wildly.
"Hang on, Dad!" cried Johnny. "This is always where the mailman and I get bucked off!"
Strip Club Raises Money For Haiti
TOLEDO, Ohio, USA -- A strip club in Toledo, Ohio, has raised money to help the people of Haiti, Voyeurwebbers,
The club, Marilyn's on Monroe, raised almost $1,000 for victims of the earthquake that devastated Haiti by hosting a charity fund-raising event called "Lap Dances for Haiti". The club donated all of its $10 cover charges for one day to the International Services of Hope charity.
According to local news media, the name of the event was misleading because strip clubs are legal in Ohio but lap-dances are not.
Club manager Kenny Soprano said he had been considering a charity event to improve the club's reputation even before the Haiti earthquake. "We'd been racking our brains for about a month or so, thinking about what we could do," he said. "You don't hear much about strip clubs giving back to the community.
"It was pretty hard to find an organization that wants to deal with an adult entertainment establishment," said Soprano.
Linda Greene, CEO of International Services of Hope, said she was happy to accept the donation: "I don't have a problem with it," she said.
Weirdness by K.
The weirdest thing recently happened in the U.S. state of New Jersey, Voyeurwebbers; it even had allusions, or possibly illusions, to the movie "The Godfather", which would seem to be a fit in New Jersey ... and yet it doesn't fit at all.
Here's what happened: Robert Godman, 61, of Wenonah, New Jersey, apparently had a package delivered to a state senator named Stephen Sweeney. Sen. Sweeny was acting governor while Gov. Jon Corzine was on vacation. When staffers opened the package the were alarmed to find -- Eye hope's you're sitting down for this, Voyeurwebbers -- (Cue the organist!).... a plush toy horse's head!
Despite their shock, the staffers had the presence of mind to call in a bomb squad as a precaution.
According to one news report the incident appeared a likely allusion to the classic cinematic scene in "The Godfather," in which a horse's head was used as a death threat by the Mafia.
In the end, the plush toy horse's head was found to be ... a ... er ... umm ... plush toy horse's head.
Nonetheless, Mr. Godman was arrested at the home he shares with his parents and charged with harassment. New Jersey State Police said they were looking into whether Godman and the package are related to a recent series of letters and faxes.
"We take every interaction with our government officials seriously, at least of this nature," said a state police sergeant. "This was not just some benign communication."
Eye warned you this would be weird, Voyeurwebbers. And it leaves some interesting questions, for instance: If delivering a real, severed horse's head is considered a Mafia death threat, what does a plush toy horse's head mean in "Mafia-ese"? Is the mob going to put out a "cuddle" on you instead of a hit? And what did the state police sergeant mean when he said, "... at least of this nature"? It makes Eye wonder if New Jersey is being hit by a deluge of packages delivered with plush-toy animal parts. Actually, that does sound a little creepy.
As Eye sees it, Voyeurwebbers, it could be possible, though not probable, that Mr. Godman sent the wrong part of the plush toy horse to the good senator. He might have meant to send the plush toy horse's plush patootie instead. That way the message would be clear ... and no official in his or her right mind -- with the possible exception of New Jersey -- would want to launch a costly investigation into a plush toy horse's plush patootie, so that problem would be moot and tax dollars saved. K.
1. Man Talk
Three Catholic men were talking.
The first said, "My son is a priest; when he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'."
The second man piped in, "My son is a bishop; when he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Your Grace'."
The third man smiled. "My daughter is 6-feet tall with 38D breasts, a 24-inch waist, and 34-inch hips. When she walks into a room, everyone says, 'Oh, my God!' "
2. More Bumper Stickers
1. The Proctologist called ... They found your head!
2. Save your breath ... You'll need it to blow up your date.
3. WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.
3. Little Johnny Joke No. 1,497
One day, little Johnny got home from pre-school early and headed upstairs. As he walked by his parents' bedroom, he was surprised to see his parents naked on their bed, making love. Not wanting to traumatize the child, they continued what they were doing. Soon Johnny asked, "Daddy, can I climb on your back for a horsey ride?"
Dad thought a moment and replied, "I suppose so, son. After all, we are a family."
After he rode a while, his mother started writhing wildly.
"Hang on, Dad!" cried Johnny. "This is always where the mailman and I get bucked off!"
Strip Club Raises Money For Haiti
TOLEDO, Ohio, USA -- A strip club in Toledo, Ohio, has raised money to help the people of Haiti, Voyeurwebbers,
The club, Marilyn's on Monroe, raised almost $1,000 for victims of the earthquake that devastated Haiti by hosting a charity fund-raising event called "Lap Dances for Haiti". The club donated all of its $10 cover charges for one day to the International Services of Hope charity.
According to local news media, the name of the event was misleading because strip clubs are legal in Ohio but lap-dances are not.
Club manager Kenny Soprano said he had been considering a charity event to improve the club's reputation even before the Haiti earthquake. "We'd been racking our brains for about a month or so, thinking about what we could do," he said. "You don't hear much about strip clubs giving back to the community.
"It was pretty hard to find an organization that wants to deal with an adult entertainment establishment," said Soprano.
Linda Greene, CEO of International Services of Hope, said she was happy to accept the donation: "I don't have a problem with it," she said.
Weirdness by K.
The weirdest thing recently happened in the U.S. state of New Jersey, Voyeurwebbers; it even had allusions, or possibly illusions, to the movie "The Godfather", which would seem to be a fit in New Jersey ... and yet it doesn't fit at all.
Here's what happened: Robert Godman, 61, of Wenonah, New Jersey, apparently had a package delivered to a state senator named Stephen Sweeney. Sen. Sweeny was acting governor while Gov. Jon Corzine was on vacation. When staffers opened the package the were alarmed to find -- Eye hope's you're sitting down for this, Voyeurwebbers -- (Cue the organist!).... a plush toy horse's head!
Despite their shock, the staffers had the presence of mind to call in a bomb squad as a precaution.
According to one news report the incident appeared a likely allusion to the classic cinematic scene in "The Godfather," in which a horse's head was used as a death threat by the Mafia.
In the end, the plush toy horse's head was found to be ... a ... er ... umm ... plush toy horse's head.
Nonetheless, Mr. Godman was arrested at the home he shares with his parents and charged with harassment. New Jersey State Police said they were looking into whether Godman and the package are related to a recent series of letters and faxes.
"We take every interaction with our government officials seriously, at least of this nature," said a state police sergeant. "This was not just some benign communication."
Eye warned you this would be weird, Voyeurwebbers. And it leaves some interesting questions, for instance: If delivering a real, severed horse's head is considered a Mafia death threat, what does a plush toy horse's head mean in "Mafia-ese"? Is the mob going to put out a "cuddle" on you instead of a hit? And what did the state police sergeant mean when he said, "... at least of this nature"? It makes Eye wonder if New Jersey is being hit by a deluge of packages delivered with plush-toy animal parts. Actually, that does sound a little creepy.
As Eye sees it, Voyeurwebbers, it could be possible, though not probable, that Mr. Godman sent the wrong part of the plush toy horse to the good senator. He might have meant to send the plush toy horse's plush patootie instead. That way the message would be clear ... and no official in his or her right mind -- with the possible exception of New Jersey -- would want to launch a costly investigation into a plush toy horse's plush patootie, so that problem would be moot and tax dollars saved. K.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Even 2 More Quickies
Even 2 More Quickies
1. At The Car Dealership
A lady walked into a Lexus dealership just to browse. Suddenly she spotted the most beautiful car that she had ever seen and walked over to inspect it. As she bent forward to feel the fine leather upholstery, an unexpected little fart escaped.
Embarrassed, she anxiously looked around to see if anyone had noticed and hoped a salesperson hadn't been near. But, as she turned back, there, standing next to her, was a salesman.
With a pleasant smile he greeted her, "Good day, Madame. How may we help you today?"
Trying to maintain an air of sophistication and acting as though nothing had happened, she smiled back and asked, "Sir, what is the price of this lovely vehicle?"
Still smiling pleasantly, he replied, "Madame, I'm very sorry to say that, if you farted simply from touching it, you are going to shit when you hear the price."
2. Why Men Have Better Friends
Women's Friends: A woman didn't come home one night. The next day she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's house.
The husband called his wife's 10 best friends. None of them knew what she was talking about.
Men's Friends: A man didn't come home one night. The next day he told his wife that he had slept over at a friend's house.
The wife called her husband's 10 best friends. Eight of them confirmed that he had slept over, and two claimed he was still there.
Embedded Text Messages Ruin Relationship
WINNIPEG, Manitoba, Canada -- Maintaining a relationship can be difficult enough at times, Voyeurwebbers, but technology may now be making it even more difficult. Consider the case of a 49-year-old man in Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada, who recently bought a new Samsung Virgin Mobil phone.
Suggestive text messages embedded in a new cellphone cost the man his relationship when his girlfriend discovered them, said officials. The man, who didn't want to be identified, told the Winnipeg journalists his girlfriend of more than two years found the messages on the phone and a break-up fight ensued.
He said he didn't even know the Samsung Virgin Mobile phone was text-equipped, but the three messages that came with the phone cost him the relationship. They included "Booty call," "Where u at," and "Be there soon," according to news reports.
He said Virgin Mobile advised him to file a written complaint.
The man also showed the messages to staff at the Future Shop store where he bought the cellphone.
"At first, we didn't believe him," said a sales associate. "But when we looked at a couple of the same [model] phones he bought, and found they all had the same messages ... we all felt horrible."
Strip Clubs by K.
While freedom of expression and freedom of choice won a victory last week in the U.S. state of Maryland's Montgomery County, Voyeurwebbers, a few states southwest of Maryland efforts are being made to do just the opposite.
In Jefferson City, Missouri, members of the state Senate gave preliminary approval of legislation that may change the "show me" state, into the "don't show me" state.
The legislation would placing far-reaching restrictions on adult-entertainment businesses in Missouri, and may continue on a legislative fast track due to a federal investigation.
State Sen. Matt Bartle presented the bill on the Senate floor just two days after he appeared before a federal grand jury in Kansas City, Missouri, to answer questions about the defeat of a nearly identical bill in 2005.
To become law, legislation approved Thursday must be voted on once more in the Senate, passed through the state House and ultimately signed by the governor. But if successful, it would represent a sea change for adult-oriented businesses.
Among the legislation's provisions: Nudity would be banned in strip clubs. Semi-nude dancers would have to stay at least six feet away from and not touch patrons. Adult businesses would have to close between midnight and 6 a.m. and could not sell alcohol. Adult businesses could not be opened within 1,000 feet of a school, church, day-care facility, library, park, residence or another adult business.
If upheld in court, the law probably would shut down strip clubs and adult bookstores, said attorney Dick Bryant, who represents about a dozen adult entertainment businesses in the Kansas City area.
As Eye sees it, Voyeurwebbers, banning nudity in strip clubs violates the constitutional right to freedom of expression for the dancers, and violates freedom of choice for both the dancers and the club's customers, as does the proposed ban on selling alcohol in adult entertainment establishments. Eye also thinks the Missouri state legislature has more important issues to deal with these days than putting the employees of 12 local businesses out of work. K.
1. At The Car Dealership
A lady walked into a Lexus dealership just to browse. Suddenly she spotted the most beautiful car that she had ever seen and walked over to inspect it. As she bent forward to feel the fine leather upholstery, an unexpected little fart escaped.
Embarrassed, she anxiously looked around to see if anyone had noticed and hoped a salesperson hadn't been near. But, as she turned back, there, standing next to her, was a salesman.
With a pleasant smile he greeted her, "Good day, Madame. How may we help you today?"
Trying to maintain an air of sophistication and acting as though nothing had happened, she smiled back and asked, "Sir, what is the price of this lovely vehicle?"
Still smiling pleasantly, he replied, "Madame, I'm very sorry to say that, if you farted simply from touching it, you are going to shit when you hear the price."
2. Why Men Have Better Friends
Women's Friends: A woman didn't come home one night. The next day she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's house.
The husband called his wife's 10 best friends. None of them knew what she was talking about.
Men's Friends: A man didn't come home one night. The next day he told his wife that he had slept over at a friend's house.
The wife called her husband's 10 best friends. Eight of them confirmed that he had slept over, and two claimed he was still there.
Embedded Text Messages Ruin Relationship
WINNIPEG, Manitoba, Canada -- Maintaining a relationship can be difficult enough at times, Voyeurwebbers, but technology may now be making it even more difficult. Consider the case of a 49-year-old man in Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada, who recently bought a new Samsung Virgin Mobil phone.
Suggestive text messages embedded in a new cellphone cost the man his relationship when his girlfriend discovered them, said officials. The man, who didn't want to be identified, told the Winnipeg journalists his girlfriend of more than two years found the messages on the phone and a break-up fight ensued.
He said he didn't even know the Samsung Virgin Mobile phone was text-equipped, but the three messages that came with the phone cost him the relationship. They included "Booty call," "Where u at," and "Be there soon," according to news reports.
He said Virgin Mobile advised him to file a written complaint.
The man also showed the messages to staff at the Future Shop store where he bought the cellphone.
"At first, we didn't believe him," said a sales associate. "But when we looked at a couple of the same [model] phones he bought, and found they all had the same messages ... we all felt horrible."
Strip Clubs by K.
While freedom of expression and freedom of choice won a victory last week in the U.S. state of Maryland's Montgomery County, Voyeurwebbers, a few states southwest of Maryland efforts are being made to do just the opposite.
In Jefferson City, Missouri, members of the state Senate gave preliminary approval of legislation that may change the "show me" state, into the "don't show me" state.
The legislation would placing far-reaching restrictions on adult-entertainment businesses in Missouri, and may continue on a legislative fast track due to a federal investigation.
State Sen. Matt Bartle presented the bill on the Senate floor just two days after he appeared before a federal grand jury in Kansas City, Missouri, to answer questions about the defeat of a nearly identical bill in 2005.
To become law, legislation approved Thursday must be voted on once more in the Senate, passed through the state House and ultimately signed by the governor. But if successful, it would represent a sea change for adult-oriented businesses.
Among the legislation's provisions: Nudity would be banned in strip clubs. Semi-nude dancers would have to stay at least six feet away from and not touch patrons. Adult businesses would have to close between midnight and 6 a.m. and could not sell alcohol. Adult businesses could not be opened within 1,000 feet of a school, church, day-care facility, library, park, residence or another adult business.
If upheld in court, the law probably would shut down strip clubs and adult bookstores, said attorney Dick Bryant, who represents about a dozen adult entertainment businesses in the Kansas City area.
As Eye sees it, Voyeurwebbers, banning nudity in strip clubs violates the constitutional right to freedom of expression for the dancers, and violates freedom of choice for both the dancers and the club's customers, as does the proposed ban on selling alcohol in adult entertainment establishments. Eye also thinks the Missouri state legislature has more important issues to deal with these days than putting the employees of 12 local businesses out of work. K.
THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 11, 2010
THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 11, 2010
Today's Cryptogram
Cryptogram for February 11 Below is today's love quote cryptogram (single letter substitution): ZY ZHV HJZRYGYL VKJJYVV QZU ZHV NRGYL QYNN, NHKWZYL UBFYP, HPL NUGYL CKJZ.....TYVVRY VFHPNYS Answer to yesterday's cryptogram: Try praising your wife, even if it does frighten her at first..... Billy Sunday |
(Hint: It's an inspirational quote or bit o' wisdom, with the name of the person who is credited as having said it.)
Cryptogram
"XJZV CAXRY OAX PGMY CX EGLZ
FMYGCZV QGJ YBYM GQALYBY
FMYGCZV." --MXNYMC E.
IYJJYPV
My Decoded Version
"---- ----- --- ---- -- ----
------- --- ---- -------
-------." -------- -.
-------
The Encrypted Letter
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
represents
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z -
A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K | L | M |
- | - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - |
3 | 2 | 5 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 6 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 0 | 2 | 6 |
N | O | P | Q | R | S | T | U | V | W | X | Y | Z |
- | - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - |
1 | 1 | 2 | 2 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 4 | 0 | 5 | 11 | 4 |
Yesterday's Cryptogram Answer, and Today's Quote of the Day, is:
"Expect trouble as an inevitable part of life and when it comes, hold your head high, look it squarely in the eye and say, "I will be bigger than you. You cannot defeat me." --Ann Landers
R XYK'B WRFP BY GJQAP CL MPAGYKQW WRTP...RB VYNWXK'B DP MPAGYKQW RT R GJQAPX RB
ZPYAZP HWYYKPL
GFBK OV JDK CKGOTDJQAG OHJKSBYG EKJNKKH IKKJOHT Y EKYAJOQAG TOSG YHC COVUFBKSOHT JDYJ VDK GFFLV GOLK Y DYCCFUL
XFDH EYSSZIFSK
O SYDA NFP KLA ZYHC NU BSOTS HU MAAP YWA IFORAR, YLR PSYP OX PSA ZYHC KM AECAWOALTA. O QLKB LK BYU KM VFRIOLI PSA MFPFWA NFP NU PSA CYXP. FLQLKBL
Y8X8YHYYNYY82MFSJMKM23GM2Z4SVAJMMMHDFM1S5ZBVRV5CQF535ZG6TZQZUZVZ3ZC8XAGEG8Y418YN4MPS8S2M197M2MPMRQUS231M2M2ZGV9Z2Z3ZKZ5ZJVQKTVW45M4Z5R3AQ92W78Z6X8Y3UMH3PA2MRD2MMM3S3MPM2SAM2HJVR3H61Z5MVZVTHV466V5ZJB5Y5M
I HAVE BUT ONE LAMP BY WHICH MY FEET ARE GUIDED, AND THAT IS THE LAMP OF EXPERIENCE. I KNOW NO WAY OF JUDGING THE FUTURE BUT BY THE PAST. UNKNOWN
2/11 ZX GXQ HKYAE HKS ZSLXRTJHYR ZXAESG JAZ TSVQIBYRJA SBSVKJAH RXQBZ IS RXACYZSTSZ VJTHG JAYLJBC?
Y868YHYYBYY82MFSJMKM2NGM2Z4SVAJMRMPDFM1S5ZBVRV5UQF535ZG6TZQZBZVZ3ZC8X9G4G8Y518YN4MPS8SRM397M2MPMRQUS231M2M2ZGV9Z3Z4ZKZ5ZJVQKTVG35M4Z5R3AQ9ZWM8Z6X8Y3UMH3PS2MRD2MMM3S3MPM2SAM2HJVR3R6UZ5MVZVTHV46665ZJB5Y5M
2/11 DO YOU THINK THE DEMOCRATIC DONKEY AND REPUBLICAN ELEPHANT COULD BE CONSIDERED PARTY ANIMALS?
Today's Crypto Number (2215) (Thursday)
RFH BHZBSH YFZ CVH VHNCVQHQ CW UZVCS STUJPCVJHW CVH RFZWH YFZ EZVHNZ ZVQJPCVD BSHCWTVHW RFHUWHSIHW CPQ EJPQ MZUBHPWCRJZP JP JPRHVEHVJPN YJRF RFH BSHCWTVHW ZE ZRFHVW.--LHVRVCPQ VTWWHSS
Hint: R=T
Yesterday's Answer Number(390) (Wednesday) BTLI TE AMWF Y GYH ZFYZ HNM GNMBR ENZ CI YAFYUIR ZN AIBB HNMK DYKKNZ ZN ZFI ZNGE VNAATD.--GTBB KNVIKA Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip.--Will Rogers
Wordles Thought for the Day:
-henriFrederic Amiel
SPGW E HGFVJW HYEWV ZJ VQHGFICVG E ZFCH ZJ GQFJHG, SCYY PG JIGFVGE CZ?
Hint: G = E
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
